Fleeing

I feel like fleeing—
just up!
and running away.

God! I can’t take this.
How did I manage,
all those years ago?

I don’t know what I’m saying anymore.

I feel frantic—
I feel panicked—
I feel alone.

I’m hoping for a close call
so that maybe you’ll see.

I’m too scared to take it that far.
I’m weak! I’m weak!
I’ll face death in the flesh
but jump at every question.

You’ll make me stop.
You’ll ask me why.

And you’ll be pissed
that I’ve hidden everything
for all these years.

Today I want to run.
I don’t want to die,
and I don’t want to cry.
I just want to run.

Something’s making me
want to be someone else
and leave it all behind.

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