during, i can find solace,
but yesterday i had two hours
to learn that it’s not enough

maybe it’s better when
there’s no competition,
no ranks, no official
record of my mediocrity.

but it can’t last forever.

i ran eleven miles and realized
that this won’t make me good enough.

i fought back tears whilst doing
the one thing i love,
the one thing i do for me,
because it’s meaningless.

you don’t give a fuck
about the effort i put into this.

even if i was the best,
i wouldn’t be good enough for you.
hell, even though i’m “perfect”
to pretty much everyone else,
i’m still not good enough.

there’s always someone better:
someone else worth anyone’s time.

i’ll never be good enough.
and i’m never happy,
not even doing things i like.

no one would give a shit,
so why don’t i do everyone a favor,
and just put the finish line here?

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