all i could think:
i hope i looked skinny up there.

and you’re telling me about honor
and you’re telling me about failure
and you’re telling me about how
fucking great you think i am,
just ‘cause i’m sitting here.

but i’m only thinking,
am i the skinniest one here?

so why are you telling me how
proud i should be of myself?

can’t you see
that i am still failing here,
can’t you see
that i’m going to lie again?

what honor?
only failure,
not wanting
to be fixed.