Lights Are Off

where was the psych evaluation
before letting me chase this goal?

everyone’s so damn proud of me
for dropping an old, faded dream,
but let’s check the situation here:

i’ve got a key to my own destruction.

unrestricted. unobstructed.

materials safety data sheets:
ironic that they enable me to
rank these reagents and sort these solvents
by their potential toxicity to my well-being.

surrounded by masters who
bank their careers on
observation and critical thought,
yet still no one sees…

i’ll write this in my empty notebook,
for this is not an accident.

who the hell is going to come down here?
one desperate moment—

who the hell suspects me to abuse this?
one desperate moment—

unrestricted. unobstructed.

lights are off.
i’m alone.

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