Empty Everything

Written June 18, 2010

I never wrote much about you,
and I feel like a monster to admit
that maybe it was all a distraction.

Did I ever love you for a second?
‘Cause I felt like hell knowing
you wanted it more than I did.

And when it seemed I did so much it hurt—
I’m sure I just didn’t want to lose
the ability to control you.

When was the passion ever there?

I rushed into you
without the burning desire
I felt and now feel
for those who are decent enough
not to use my desperation.

And I’m still
too stubborn a person
to say sorry

for letting you live
two years a lie.